Saturday, 25 July 2009

Think Big, Dream Bigger.

So last night, I had my leaving drinks. As I was stood at the bar, I looked through to the 'band room' where I have played many times, and stood and watched other local bands do their thing. It looked surprisingly different in the dark, with tables and chairs and just two weird looking middle-aged woman and a small dog. It's normally brimming with excitement and energy and sparsely populated on the floor with a young band eager to impress. It made me think, in an unintended cliche, that dreams can start here. I've certainly watched two bands play here a few times who are now heading onwards and out of the pub circuit and into the world of music videos, professional recordings and iTunes.
I feel blessed with the talent I've been given, and am more than excited ahead of starting my music course at uni. I just see it as my stepping stone, because four years ago I was adament that my 'then' band would settle for nothing less than everything and it wouldn't be a problem getting there. I grew up, people fell out, and reality hit with a bang. I was just glad for my pedantic side which signed up for uni as a 'Plan B' route. But it's fine now, because uni can only provide me with the necassary contacts and experience and, most importantly, new people to discover and play with to 'make it', however this might be. And I take my dreams with a pinch of salt these days (but only a tiny one) and, who wouldn't want the whole fame package, but I'm not lying when I say that I'd settle for any kind of living that sees me making music and money. I'd be truly grateful for that, and I know also that it will happen, it's just a matter of time.
It was a long chain of thought as I was propped up at the bar, waiting for another drink that I didn't really need, as I peered at the dark shadows looming in the next room and wondered when it would next come to life. How different one room can be. Quite the disguise it was wearing. There is, however, an exception to the dream. If I'm 40, and still playing in that room, I'm out. I can't help but feel bad for the blues guys that are doing it still; who knows if they're just doing it for fun or kidding themselves that it might still happen. I mean, if they are enjoying themselves, then good on them, but when I peer in from the same position that I was in last night and all three of the crowd are tapping their feet, I can't help but think they're feeling a little cheated. Maybe they're touring, so it's OK 'cause they are having fun, but what if they're local. What if they never really got out of this little town in the middle of nowhere. Which had a big influence on my reconsidering of my chosen uni. I decided that now was the time to go a bit further away, to somewhere bigger and more thriving, somewhere I'd feel out of place but somewhere that I could try and touch more people that wasn't still within range of the local weather forecast on the local news channel that I was watching in the same region of the country. OK, so it's not a million miles away, but it's enough. And I can't fucking wait. Top 40, here I come.

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Thanks for taking the time to write :)